i hate my mom. she makes me so self conscious. i wish she would shut the fuck up sometimes. “allie, you’re so skinny, like a bone! you need to eat some more food! you are so skinny, you’re going to get sick!” ookay mom, thanks for the input, don’t need to be such a bitch about it. i don’t even know what she’s talking about, i love food and eat a lot, and i’m not THAT skinny. it really hurts when she says that. oh and of course “YOU SHOULDN’T PLAY COMPUTER SO MUCH!!!! YOU’RE LIKE A CRAZY PERSON!!!!” then when i angrily close the door, she opens it and says “SEE!! CRAZY PERSON!! JUST LOOK AT YOUR FACE!!”

……i hate her. why can’t i be one of those people with awesome nice moms.

i’m not crazy about my dad either, but at least he doesn’t make me self conscious. on purpose. it’s funny cause when i was younger i liked my dad a lot better because my dad always talked shit about my mom and talked about himself like he was the best fucking person in the world, then i got a little older and realized what a dipshit my dad was being and liked my mom better. now i don’t like either of them. ha.

18. Disrespecting parents: I dunno what this one is asking.. lol

19. Something that never fails to make me feel better: Exercising. Nothing else. Maybe my friends sometimes. I just get upset too easily. /:

businessofmisery-:

I want a boy to do this to me

well this time i didn’t forget, it’s just 1 am and tomorrow if i look and see i only did 16 but i see the date then i’m gonna be like oh today was 16 when it was actually 17. that did not make sense, did it.

16. 3 things you are proud of about your personality: This is a hard one. Umm, okay.. 1. I don’t say things to put people down as much as other people always do; I make an effort to make people feel good about themselves. 2. I try to accept other people’s views on things. 3. I open up a lot to friends and I can be totally crazy and awesome.

17. Things that make you scared: FUCKING SPIDERS, the dark, walking around the house at night when everyone is asleep, scary movies (yeah I know they make everyone scared but they make me REALLY scared, like i fucking cry sometimes when i watch scary movies), heights, thinking about the future.

He thinks that the whole fucking house is his. He doesn’t respect anyone else’s opinions besides his and forces his ideas on people, even to my mom. He thinks he pays for everything we own even though my mom gets barely any sleep since she works so much. Her hours are 11 pm to 7 am. The time that most people sleep, she works. She gets only one day off, Saturday. My dad wakes up at 9 or 10 am and goes to work as late as 1, then complains because his boss gets mad at him. Dad, you are the most unreasonable, annoying, inconsiderate person I know. I wish I had a different dad. I know that he tried to be a good father… But he definitely didn’t succeed.. He’s so extremely inconsiderate to other people, it’s hard to fucking believe. I hate when I tell someone that I don’t like my dad, and then they say “That’s mean.” You don’t know my dad… so how can you even say that? Not everyone has a perfect dad like you do, mkay? I wish I did. I know this girl, and she says that when she’s sad, her dad takes her out for drives to just talk, or takes her shopping. My dad would never fucking do that. First of all, I’m not even able to talk to him without getting annoyed. He gives the most horrible advice.. He didn’t have much of a social life when he was younger, so I guess that’s why he doesn’t really understand teenage girls. At all. Like, he THINKS he knows what I’m thinking because he reads so many fucking parenting books (so that OBVIOUSLY means that he is the BEST PARENT IN THE WHOLE UNIVERSE, or at least that’s what he thinks) but they aren’t even accurate. One of his amazing parenting books is titled “Sex, drugs, rock n’ roll and your child” or something like that. Okay… I have no desire to have sex anytime soon; I have never even had a boyfriend. I have no desire to get into drugs nor do I feel any pressure to have drugs; I live in an area where even in high school not that many people do drugs. And, I dunno what the fuck rock n’ roll has to do with drugs and sex and bad influence but, I don’t listen to it. So, when he was away I read a little of this book… And it was completely wrong… and I’m not just saying that. It was not accurate. At. All. Ugh.. Nevermind..

I hate crying. See, nothing bad really even happened… I always cry at the randomest times. My crush rejects me but also slow dances with me? I don’t cry, I just feel weird and kinda sad. But then I think about it two weeks after it happened, and it suddenly hits me TWO WEEKS LATE and I start crying. And now, I just randomly get annoyed at my dad and I start thinking about it and I start crying. wtf. Why can’t I be someone else? You know those people at your school who seem like they have perfect lives? Perfect boyfriends, perfect families, perfect clothes, perfect personalities..I know, I don’t know them that well so I can’t say they’re “perfect.” But they sure seem perfect and I would give a lot to have a life like them.

Sorry.. I needed to rant..